Tuesday, November 4, 1997
UCLA berth
in Rose Bowl would give life to New Year’s
COLUMN After years in dullsville, Bruins have something to
anticipate
By Mark Shapiro
You know, sometimes not having a life can be a good thing.
While some were out forging memories in a Winnebago to Stanford
or trying to recall the memory of the absurd Halloween celebration
at Madison’s, others were watching a rose-colored door fly wide
open.
Some of us, you see, had to forego the trip to Chelsea Clinton’s
new hangout and had already shaken off the after-effects of
Halloween festivities (it’s funny: 10 years ago it was a sugar
hangover, and now …) to indulge in a night of study.
It is because of this neurosis that we select few were able to
turn on the television at 10:17 Saturday night in a fit of
procrastinators’ bliss and watch the Arizona State Sun Devils do in
the Washington State Cougars.
And what bliss that was, because, had Wazzu won that game, our
Rose Bowl hopes would have been as good as Don King’s shot at a
good-hair day.
But before we continue, let’s consider the Cougar’s unofficial,
and unfortunate, nickname, "Wazzu". Having a pseudonym that rhymes
with "kazoo" doesn’t exactly do wonders for your reputation in
intellectual circles.
Anyway, the Sun Devils’ (better than "Wazzu", but now you’re
talking heresy) little conquest, paired with the unholy thrashing
that our sturdy Bruins administered to the favorite team of the
Clintons’ sole offspring, put one-half of UCLA’s postseason fate
squarely in its lap.
Now, if you pair a UCLA victory over Washington in two weeks, in
the penultimate game of the regular season, with the Huskies
kicking the Cougars square in the Wazzu in their season finale,
well, let’s put it this way: Your New Year’s Day plans just got a
whole lot better.
I know, I know: There’s no guarantee that we’re going to win the
Pac-10 – but consider, just for the fun of it, the ramifications of
a trip to the Rose Bowl.
First off, you’ve got a New Year’s Day of some significance.
When was the last time any one of us had a New Year’s Day that
we really remember? Now, when I say remember, I don’t mean
recalling how much of a cheese ball you ate by yourself, or the
time when Uncle Milt put his foot through the television because
Florida didn’t cover the spread in the Cotton Bowl.
No, I mean remembering some visceral experience that you’ll take
to the grave, like a Bar Mitzvah or the time when you tripped
running down the hall and your braces snagged in the family room
carpet and your sister and dad laughed while you flopped around
trying to …
Sorry about that, but you get the point, and things like that
never seem to happen on New Year’s Day. Certainly, the night before
is chock-full of funny stories and strange occurrences, but New
Year’s Day really doesn’t bring much more than hors d’oeuvres and
overhyped football games.
But a New Year’s Day at the Rose Bowl is just what the doctor
ordered to kick those cheese-ball recollections and orthodontic
nightmares out of your mental Rolodex forever.
Next, you’ve got the fact that UCLA will be in a bowl of some
significance. Two years ago, the Bruins were in the Aloha Bowl,
pitted against friggin’ Kansas University, and we got walloped.
Seriously, outside of the UCLA community, something like nine
people actually gave a rat’s Wazzu.
To put into context how meaningless that bowl experience was for
everyone except the players, the game was played on Christmas Day
in Hawaii (not exactly a football hotbed), between two schools that
were in the thralls of a college basketball season.
That’s like asking baseball-crazed Americans to actually care
about the Major League Soccer championship played on the same day
as the seventh game of the World Series. Boy, who could ever be
that dumb?
But a trip to the Rose Bowl would bring the ultimate in
postseason experiences to our campus, and all it will take is the
Bruins taming the Huskies and the Huskies breaking a bunch of
kazoos.
Shapiro is a Daily Bruin staff writer and beat writer for men’s
basketball. E-mail responses to [email protected].