Wednesday, November 19, 1997
Memories of game against Huskies will last for years
COLUMN:
Thrashing of Washington leaves absent fans with feeling of
regret
When Jack London finished writing "Call of the Wild," I’ll bet
he was pretty happy with the conclusion. That noble husky standing
on the top of a mountain, head thrown back in victory, howling at
the moon.
Yeah, that seems like a nice tight ending.
Too bad he didn’t anticipate a Bruin, which has long been the
Husky’s whipping boy (or bear), rising out of a bowl of roses and
beating the hell out of it.
Thus, this distinguished American author kicks off the list of
people who I wouldn’t want to be after this weekend’s unbelievable
thrashing of the University of Washington.
Next on our tableau of "thank goodness I’m not you’s" is the
silly philosopher who told the world that it’s wrong to kick a dog.
That poor yokel is probably spinning in his grave right now,
because that miserable group of Huskies took a lifetime’s worth of
hefty Bruin boots right in the Rose Bowl bid last Saturday.
I tell you what, when "Stomp" comes back to the Wadsworth
Theater, the choreographer is going to be Bob Toledo, the dancers
will be in cleats, and the show will be exactly 52 minutes and 28
seconds long, with intermission provided only for the hearty
audience to suck down lozenges as a salve for cheering-scarred
throats.
Seriously, whose hands weren’t red and chapped from banging them
against the mitts of everyone around you every 15 seconds? Who
didn’t drive back from the Rose Bowl with a scratchy voice and a
sore throat from the continuous shouting? Who didn’t arrive home
secure in the knowledge that they had truly witnessed something
special?
Actually, there’s a hapless collection of folks dressed in
purple that might fit that criteria, thus they become our next
group.
Poor bastards.
Next up is the poor schmuck at ASUCLA who came up with the
promotion at the student store that knocks 5 percent off products
at Bearwear for every touchdown that UCLA scores, up to 25
percent.
When that idea was conceived, I’m sure that unfortunate
executive didn’t anticipate a sold-out Rose Bowl reaping a
financial windfall against a team that was being picked to win the
national championship last August.
Right now, he’s getting smacked upside the head by everyone who
has had to take a salary cut after the Bruins gave all 85,697
people at the Rose Bowl on Saturday 20 percent off all Bearwear
stuff in the second quarter alone.
At least now we’ve gotten to the root of ASUCLA’s financial
woes, it’s the only institution at UCLA that tries to give money
away instead of sucking it up faster than a Hoover.
Then there’s the unsuspecting disc jockey at KJR Radio in
Seattle who had to listen to an obnoxious UCLA student go on his
show before the game and say that the Bruins had "a decisive edge,"
and then watch as those words became fact.
As icing on the cake, this student was sure to inform the
beleaguered DJ, who was most likely swathed in seven shirts,
thermal underwear and a balaclava to ward off the Washington
winter, that it was 70 degrees and cloudless at 11 a.m. in
Pasadena.
Hey, a little salt may make the wound sting, but it will
certainly melt that snow blocking the driveway.
Finally, I would hate to be any student that couldn’t make it to
that game, because 85,697 of us are going to look back on Nov. 15,
1997, sometime down the line, and collectively crack a grin bigger
than the holes that Skip Hicks ran through all day.
Mark Shapiro is a Daily Bruin staff writer and beat writer for
men’s basketball. E-mail responses to [email protected]