Tuesday, January 27, 1998
Cross the color line through genetics
RACISM Unity is the only way we can eradicate this ‘universal
plague’
I’m sure we all agree that racism is distasteful, yet prevalent
in our society. Yes, even I, master of sarcasm, acknowledge this.
It is also important to recognize the efforts that many individuals
have put into attaining and enacting a solution to this horrid
problem that haunts each and every one of us.
Dr. Clyde W. Ford, author of a newly published book, "We Can All
Get Along," thinks one individual can do something about racism.
Unless this person is myself, it cannot be. The widely held view is
that racism is institutional, and is much too big for any one
individual, but Ford thinks differently, and gives "50 Steps You
Can Take To Help End Racism. "
Among the examples he gives are the following:
1. Substitute "person of color" for "non-white"; substitute
"economically exploited" for "economically disadvantaged." As if
becoming "PC" about the whole thing is really going to better the
present situation.
2. Organize a multicultural crafts fair. Invite members of
different ethnic groups to present art forms unique to their ethnic
heritage. You know, this touchy-feely play on one’s emotions does
nothing but serve as an overbearing barrier to the solution.
3. Attend meetings of your local school board. Voice your
opinions about curricula, hiring decisions and other issues related
to ending racism – clearly an idea that is irrelevant at this point
in fixing the problem.
I honestly do feel bad for Ford and the many others like him who
hypothesize these nonsense schemes that have not worked for the
last couple of hundred years. OK, so they are not nonsense; but
history has proven that they have not fully achieved what they
sought out to do. One would think that after so many years someone
would actually get the hint.
Better communication is clearly not going to be the prevailing
factor in solving the problem. Fellow Bruins, people do not want to
make any changes in their lifestyle that will inevitably lead to
only darker tunnels.
What I propose to you today is a far simpler and more
straightforward answer to racism. We must break the concepts of
"black" and "white." As history has proven, words alone cannot do
this. We must biologically alter our colors to make a pure mix of
all tones and shades so that no two colors can be distinguished by
word of mouth. Yes, I am suggesting that we immediately cease all
procreation with our current race and limit it to people of the
opposite color.
Mendelian genetics is the solution to racism. For purposes of
procreation, blacks and whites must not have sex with the same
race. Sex for pleasure is permissible under the condition that it
will go no further. This idea may sound absurd, but its brilliance
is obvious.
Moreover, this idea is not racist. "Blacks" and "whites" will
not exist after this idea is enforced. Both will be at a loss if
they want to have a child with an individual of their same
color.
Persons desiring intimate relationships with others of the same
color can still do so, as long as they do not have children
together. Over time (and I don’t deny that it will take a lot of
time and commitment), the color line will begin to disappear, I
will win my Nobel Peace Prize, and life will present new problems
to haunt us with.
The physical color line will vanish, and so too will the social
problems that are attributed to race. For example, there will be a
significant decline in the number of blacks on Skid Row in Los
Angeles. A recent study done by Jeff Dietrich, founder of the Los
Angeles Catholic Worker soup kitchen, estimated the racial
breakdown for Skid Row in Los Angeles at 15 percent White, 10
percent Latino and 75 percent African American.
We would be helping to end the stereotype that blacks make up a
great majority of our homeless problem.
We will also be ending the typecast that whites are psychotic.
Jeffrey Dahmer, Theodore Kaczynski, Timothy McVeigh and many others
prove this stereotype true … but not for long. Soon, our unity
will be responsible for all social mishaps. Hate crimes tied to
color will immediately cease and unity will prevail.
For 400 years, America has continued to stereotype black people.
Blaming black people is as American as apple pie, and we shouldn’t
think this is going to be the last time America falsely indicts the
black man. Time has proven that the victimizer in this unfortunate
situation is not going to change, so we have an obligation to
humanity to change both the victim and the victimizer.
Retired Gen. Colin Powell recently called for a dialogue to end
racism in America and said that no one individual has the power,
influence or other abilities to bring a solution to the problem. He
is right. Humanity being what it is, there is certainly no one
individual who has the wherewithal to end racism in America. Powell
hit the proverbial nail on the head when he said, "Don’t expect one
person to come along and transcend the gap that currently exists
between these two parts of America."
That is a very realistic way of looking at such a major problem,
because history has illustrated that all the great obstacles of
America took many people to solve. Examples include the American
Revolution, ending slavery, the culmination of the Great Depression
and its associated misfortunes, or any of the millions of other
monumental challenges facing our nation. People of great courage,
confidence, commitment, loyalty and national pride, those who have
love of country, those who hope for a better world and the like,
have bonded together to overcome the problem.
That is what America is all about and that is why racism, one of
the most poisonous threats to our great nation’s continued
existence, will not defeat us. Our minds, logic and a nice
comfortable mattress will be the foundation for ending a problem
that has stalked us for so many years.
Perhaps ending racism on the basis of Mendelian genetics is not
all that realistic. The point is that modern day theologians have
developed theories on eradicating a universal plague that have
simply not carried out their desired goals. We must join hands and
work as a union to fix the plight of today in order to better
tomorrow’s future.