Rueter teaches political science at UCLA. His Web site is
DrPolitics.com, and is the author of “The 267 Stupidest
Things Republicans Ever Said/ The 267 Stupidest Things Democrats
Ever Said”.
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By Ted Rueter
Al Gore is a man of many wardrobes. For years, he donned dark
blue suits with white shirts and power ties, while standing stiffly
next to the president. Upon the advice of Naomi Wolf, “Alpha
Al” switched to earth tones. When he met with Jesse Ventura,
the vice president was wearing blue jeans and cowboy boots. At most
summertime campaign appearances, Gore sported khaki pants and
short-sleave cotton shirts.
Gore’s attire has captured the public’s imagination.
In his acceptance speech at the Republican convention, George W.
Bush said, “I am not running in borrowed clothes.”
Humorist Dave Barry says that one day, Gore’s “wearing
a suit; the next day it’s cowboy boots and earth tones; the
next day it’s a tutu and nipple rings ““ you never know,
with Al!”
After the controversy over Gore’s new earth tones, Tipper
Gore remarked, “He’s not wearing anything when he goes
to bed!”
One constant in Gore’s apparel is a Palm Pilot V, strapped
to his belt. And I find this abhorrent.
Palm Pilots are all the rage. More than 5 million have been sold
since they were introduced in 1996. These hand-held computers can
synchronize phone lists and calendars with software on a desktop
computer. Palm Pilots can access the Internet. Palm software often
includes currency converters, calculators, dictionaries and
recipes. Now there are even designer Palm Pilots. The Claudia
Schiffer Edition Palm Vx, available in “brushed metallic
aqua,” includes the model’s favorite software.
 The Associated Press Democratic presidential candidate
Vice President Al Gore speaks at a town-hall-style
meeting at Manatee Community College in Bradenton, Fla. Among
politicians, Palm Pilots are the new status symbol. With a few
clicks of the Palm’s pointer (sending infrared signals),
reporters and staffers can exchange data bases. The leader of the
Iowa House of Representatives announces the day’s schedule by
reading from his Palm Pilot.
U.S. Senate Democratic Leader Tom Daschle is a fervent Palmite.
And now the Democratic National Committee lets you be “on the
Go with AvantGo,” a “personal digital assistant”
manufacturer: “All you need is AvantGo’s free browser
software, and our special AvantGo Web site will be downloaded to
your PDA every time you sync with your desktop computer.”
Al Gore seems to have endless faith in science and technology.
He coined the term “information superhighway” and was
instrumental in securing federal funding for the Internet. He wants
to wire every classroom and library in the country. In his speech
at the Democratic National Convention, Gore noted that “there
is more computer power in a Palm Pilot than in the spaceship that
took Neil Armstrong to the moon.”
Palm Pilots are yet another example of technology run amok.
There are now more than 400 million cell phones worldwide, beeping
in churches, funeral homes and movie theaters. Some cars now come
equipped with car alarms, CD/DVD players, fax machines, wireless
Internet capability and global positioning systems. High-priced
health clubs offer Web access on stationary bikes. Boeing will soon
offer airplane passengers live television, e-mail and high-speed
Internet access.
Many junior high school students show up with cell phones,
beepers, CD players, Palm Pilots, and MP3 players. More and more
campers are “roughing it” with digital cameras,
televisions, air conditioners, generators, washer-dryers,
microwaves and satellite dishes. Global positioning systems are
being used to keep track of cows.
All this “progress” comes at a huge price. James
Gleich, author of “Faster: the Acceleration of Just About
Everything,” argues that Western society suffers from
“hurry sickness” and idolizes competitive, impatient
people. Similarly, Yale political scientist Robert E. Lane argues
in “The Loss of Happiness in Market Democracies” that
there is no positive correlation between material wealth and
personal happiness.
Indeed, he finds extensive evidence of growing clinical
depression in all advanced industrial economies. Lane contends that
market-based prosperity leads to stress and depression, because it
breaks the bonds of family and friendship.
Now, Al Gore is certainly not at fault for these trends. He
didn’t invent the DVD player, and he can’t be blamed
for America’s seeming obsession with materialism and gadgets.
But wearing a Palm Pilot seems to put the vice president on the
side of hyperactive economic growth and an even speedier
culture.
Say it ain’t so, Al. Please put away your Palm Pilot.