My dad always told me that time is money, and, in theory, this
is true. But I have time, and I do not have money. What do you do
when you can squeeze in a three-hour nap between class and dinner
but cannot afford to buy your $100 business law book? You throw
Dad’s theories out the window and begin combing the Internet
for easy, non-committal ways to make money.
By the time the middle of the month rolls around, many college
students have already used up their money for rent, utilities, food
and books. However, there is still a week and a half left where you
have to provide for movies, food and everything else. Faced with
this situation last week, I was excited to receive an e-mail
advertising a paid psychology experiment that fit into my
schedule.
As I was signing myself up to do the experiment, the Biblical
story of Jacob and Esau popped into my head: One day, Esau returns
famished from a long hunting trip and sees that his younger brother
is making stew. When he asks for a bowl, Jacob says he will trade
him one in return for Esau’s rights to the family inheritance
as the oldest son. Esau readily agrees, and Jacob hands over a bowl
of stew.
My story may be a little less dramatic, but I couldn’t
forget Jacob and Esau as I signed away two hours of my life in
return for five dollars.
Five dollars!
At least Esau got a hot meal out of it. Two dollars and 50 cents
will not even get me a fraction of the ingredients necessary for a
hearty stew.
However, after feeling a few moments of new appreciation for
Esau’s foolishness, greed took over and I immediately
wondered how much money medical guinea pigs earn as opposed to
psychology guinea pigs.
My sister used to go to the Stanford Medical Center and get paid
to have CAT scans done. Talk about a great deal; she got $50 each
time plus free pictures of her brain.
I know I am not alone in my unconventional quest to make money.
I have a lot of friends who regularly give their platelets in
exchange for movie tickets. I am pretty sure most parents would be
horrified to find out that their children are off at college
trading their lifeblood for a free matinee.
Some students, in dire need of fast weekend funds, play double
or nothing and call their parents to tell them about the
experiments, knowing that they will get one of two responses: 1)
“I don’t care how much you are being offered for your
kidney, I forbid you to do that” (result: $0); or 2) “I
don’t want you trying out new medications, even if they are
going to give you $125. I will pay you double NOT to do the
experiment” (result: $250).
Calling the parents is risky business, but I have seen it done
successfully ““ my sister’s friend received $250 from
her dad not to have a two-inch tube stuck up her nose.
But back to my $5 psych experiment. I do not know what came over
me. I wish I had a concrete explanation for doing it ““ the
whole experience has been a little unnerving ““ but really I
can hardly explain it. I no longer work minimum-wage jobs; I
usually demand more money, yet I willingly gave up two hours of my
time without even a moment’s hesitation for a third of
minimum wage. (In case you are interested, if I worked full-time at
that rate, I would earn less than $5,000 a year before taxes).
Many of you are probably wondering why I don’t just go out
and get a real job. The truth is, I expect to be tied down for the
rest of my life. As long as I can open up my daily planner and see
one free afternoon after another, I am going to keep it that
way.
Yet I still sometimes feel an overwhelming urge to make some
quick cash. Sometimes we do desperately need money for something.
Sometimes the one-day job results from a compulsion to get rid of
the guilt we feel when we are watching the DVD of “The Horse
Whisperer” at four in the afternoon on a Tuesday. Sometimes
it’s just nice to go to Burger Shanty knowing that it is not
coming out of our parents’ wallets. And when it comes down to
it, next week I will have five more dollars in my pocket than I
have this week.
Davis is a fourth-year communication studies student. E-mail
her at [email protected].